God and Prayer

I feel this blog moving in a different direction. Recently, I have been feeling compelled to write a lot. Many poems and other forms of written word have been flowing out of me. I definitely go into an altered state of mind and awareness when these "download." I also frequently get chills every time I read back over them...and I learn deeper levels of Truth from them each time. It's been a very interesting experience.

The piece I am sharing here came out of a discussion I was having with some friends online about Religion and Medicine and where the Government's responsibility lies in intervening (or not) on behalf of children whose parents refuse medical treatment for Religious reasons. The discussion turned to the power (or lack thereof) of prayer in physical healing. In replying to some of my comments, someone asked for clarification about my views on God and the role of God in Prayer. Out of that came this piece of writing, the language of which is largely consistent with the teaching of the Science of Mind. I actually started to shiver and my teeth were chattering before, and during, writing it. This is something that has happened to me numerous times when I have felt an influx of energy that needed to release.

Here is the piece:

The Nature of God

My belief is that God has a triune nature....somewhat similar to the Christian Trinity, but also different in some ways.

One aspect is Spirit.....that aspect of God that is Universal Love, Light, Light, Joy, Peace, Truth (not facts) that is the basis for the whole Universe. It is pure consciousness, pure creative impulse; expression. It can be nothing other than what God Is, so there can be no judgment, intolerance, hate, fear, punishment, etc., in the nature of God because they are fundamentally incompatible with the True nature of God....and the presence of those qualities in divinity would cause the Universe to destroy itself, because it would cease to be what It Is. Of course, we humans have free will to choose our experience, so we can make choices that lead to us experiencing the perception of these qualities in our lives.

The next aspect of God could be called Divine Principle, or Divine Law; infinite possibility; the One Mind. It includes the fundamental spiritual laws of the Universe. Much like gravity and other laws of Physics or Mathematics, Spiritual laws (such as the Law of Attraction, the Law of Cause and Effect, The Law of Mental Equivalents, Law of Averages, etc. ) work for everyone, all the time, no matter what. There is no petitioning or changing of the Law, only effective and ineffective ways of using it (well, they always work effectively, but misuse will not lead to the desired results). Not everyone understands them and knows how they work so that they may utilize them to affect their experiences in life. So Divine Law would be that aspect of God that ALWAYS says "Yes!"....because it must....it is the 'blind force' aspect of God. It receives the impress of our collective and individual overall thought and emotional patterns and mirrors that back to us by bringing more situations into our lives that lead to more similar experiences. So, there is no such thing as punishment from God.... our experience in life is the inevitable consequence of our thought and emotional patterns. Now, this Law works equally for everyone, all the time, so the power (or relative weakness, or lack of clarity and direction) of our own emotions is directly related to how much control we will be able to embody over our own experience.

Race (or Mass/Group) Consciousness also plays a role.....so the more people that believe something to be true, the stronger your own individual conviction of the opposite Truth has to be to overcome the energy of the Group Consciousness. The other part of this, is that it is contrary to the True nature of God to desire to experience pain, hate, revenge, etc...or to wish these on other people....so the natural result of acting out of alignment with these God qualities will create a sort of "hell" in our own lives, but it is not a punishment, and we always always have the choice, in every moment, to choose a new thought that will start to create new patterns in our lives by using the Law for the benefit of All.

And the Final aspect of God....Form, Body, Creation, Experience.
This is the sum total of everything, every thought, every experience expressed as Spirit, through Law or the One Mind. It includes anything you can see, smell, taste, touch, hear, feel, or experience. Spirit is the Creative Consciousness of the Universe (of which we are each an individual expression) which sets the Law into motion by thinking/feeling into the One Mind, leading to the inevitable result: all Form and Experience.

Prayer

Each of us is a microcosm of this triune nature, and we all think into the One Mind, so prayer does nothing to God. It only changes the awareness within the one praying. If the one praying is praying for someone else, the person receiving the prayer must actually be open to receive whatever the other person is praying for, or they can actually block the manifestation, or demonstration, of it.

We are not asking or compelling or petitioning anything to happen when we pray. We simply recognize that there is nothing outside of God, the Divine Spirit, and that as a part of the Universe we must, each, also be Divinity expressing. Once we have achieved the shift in consciousness towards this awareness of the Divinity that is us, as us, through us, we simply align ourselves with this Divinity by claiming the qualities of God that we desire to see more of in our lives.....Prosperity, Abundance, Love, Light, Peace, Health, Clarity....anything that is not against the True Nature of God. Once we claim that Truth as ours, in the present moment, we have impressed our Word into the Law, and it will always say "Yes." Now, we create ALL the time, whether consciously or unconsciously, this is just a scientifically proven, tested, logical and powerful way to consciously manifest experiences in our lives. And if we end the prayer and then go back to stewing in the same ol' thoughts and emotions, we will counteract the affirmative energy we created with the prayer. Once we have claimed our Truth and our Good, all that is left to do is be grateful. Gratitude is a powerful manifestation tool as an emotion because it energetically draws to us more experiences that will cause us to feel gratitude. The last part is to release it, *know* that is it already done in the One Mind, and be open to receive the Demonstration of the Law, into Form, as Spirit Expressing. And by release, you must truly let it go. It only takes 51% faith and conviction to begin to tip the scales....but 100% equals instant demonstration such as miracles like the ones that Jesus manifested.

8-08-08

A beggar had been sitting by the side of the road for thirty years.
One day a stranger walked by.
"Spare some change?" mumbled the beggar.
"I have nothing to give you," said the stranger.
Then he asked: "What's that you're sitting on?"
"Nothing, " replied the beggar.
"Just an old box. I've been sitting on it for as long as I can remember."
"Ever look inside?," asked the stranger.
"No," said the beggar. "What's the point, there's nothing in there."
"Have a look inside," insisted the stranger. The beggar, reluctantly, managed to pry open the lid. With astonishment, disbelief, and elation, he saw that the box was filled with gold.

I am that stranger who has nothing to give you and who is telling you to look inside. Not inside any box, as in the parable, but somewhere even closer: inside yourself.
--Eckhart Tolle

On Friday, August 8, 2008 at 8 pm I had the honor of participating in a special 8-08-08 Renewal Ritual of "Healing, Blessings, and Enlightenment." It took place at the Center for Spiritual Living in Dallas, TX, and it is to be the first of 11 such rituals to be held between now and 12-21-2012 facilitated by Br. ChiSing, M.Div., M.A., and Ordained Disciple of the Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh. The number "8" is universally recognized as a sacred symbol of "New Beginnings" in many traditions around the world. For example, the Buddha taught the Noble Eightfold Path of Enlightenment, and the name of Jesus in the original Greek New Testament has a numerical value of "888." It was a truly amazing evening of singing, chanting, meditation, dance, poetry, drumming, Tibetan bowls, sacred flutes, rituals, blessings, prayer and connection. It was one of the best nights of my life, and I know that many who were there mirror that sentiment.

Aside from the Renewal Ritual I was a part of that evening, I know that there were also several very important rituals going on at different places around the planet that also contributed to the sacred energy of the evening. There were the opening ceremonies for the Olympic Games, which are very metaphysical in many aspects. Also the 8th of 12 Ascension Grid Activations was happening that evening at Queen Wilhemina State Park in Arkansas.

I was honored to be asked to participate in the ritual as one of 8 "Goddesses" who helped with the evening in facilitation and leading of song, ritual, and blessings. The 8 of us Goddesses, all dressed in white with baby's breath in our hair, gathered before the doors opened in a secluded spot to meditate together before the event. Then we all sat up on the balcony of the sanctuary of the Center for Spiritual Living, where the event would be held to watch people arrive and hold the energy of the space.

There were people receiving chair massage, and people from the DFW Oneness Blessing present to offer blessings to all who wanted it. Us Goddesses, of course, went downstairs and received our blessings with gratitude. As I waited for my turn to receive, I felt my heart start to flutter. As I kneeled down in from of the woman that was to bless me I breathed deeply and opened my heart to receive. She placed her hands on my head and I felt washed in love and peace and excited by the energy flowing through me. My heart was fluttering more as were the hands of the person blessing me. After a few moments she removed her hands and we bowed to honor one another. I headed back up stars to join the rest of the Goddesses.

I sat in mindfulness and felt an overwhelming compulsion to offer short EDINA healing sessions to each of the 7 other Goddesses. One-by-one, I asked each for their permission and connected myself in to the EDINA energy. With each Goddess, worked on them in a sitting position, sitting on the floor behind them. I felt compelled (as I often to when working with EDINA) to channel the energy into the Heart Chakra first. I placed my hands over the back of the Heart Chakra and let the energy flow through the top of my head, bifurcating at my heart and traveling down through my arms and out of my hands. With each of the 7 I felt several surges of heat energy, each stronger than the last, before I felt "complete." Then I felt moved to place one hand over the Solar Plexus Chakra while the other was over the Throat Chakra. Here I felt the same surges of heat before feeling compelled to move on to the 3rd Eye and Sacral Chakras and finally completing with the Root and Crown Chakras. As I moved from woman to woman, the sessions got faster and faster and I was filled with a sense that these beautiful beings from Sirius that are bringing the EDINA energy to the planet had a major role to play in the rituals of the evening, and would remain to do their multi-dimensional work whether I was directly connected to them or not.

As the event began we were greeted with the beautiful sounds of Tibetan Bowls played by the lovely and talented Jodi Roberts. There was also sacred Native American flute music played by John Sullivan, and drumming by Michael Kenny and friends. Michael Gott provided piano music as well. The Dreamsicles sang a duet, and as their song came to a conclusion, Br. ChiSing welcomed everyone and explained some of the chants and dances we would be doing. Following 8 bells and the sounding of a conch shell, the Taiko Drumming began. Jen and Jeremy Wanamaker, along with Lainey Bernstein played some amazing beats that got my heart pounding and the energy of the space moving as the Goddesses lined up on the stairs. As we processed in behind Br. ChiSing, holding candles and spiraling in through the standing-room-only crowd, we chanted, in three-part harmony:

"Om Amitabha Hri
Om Amitabha Hri
Om Amitabha Hri
Om Ah Hum"

Finally, we circled around the table at the center of the room and, after some ritual dancing and chanting, we placed our candles down. I really got into a trance sort of state from all of the chanting and dancing. We next each picked up a bowl of water and a sprig of baby's breath to dip in it, and wove through the crowd sprinkling each person with blessings of water as we chanted. The flow of voices and drumming lifted my spirit up as I smiled and connected with each person I blessed, heart wide open.

As the chanting ended and the drumming continued, Br. ChiSing then led everyone in the room through a Spiral Dance (<---cool animation of the dance on that link!) where everyone held hands in a circle and Br. ChiSIng led the line inward on itself like a spiral, then back out through the spiral. We chanted again during this dance, but this time our chant was:

"We are a circle
within a circle
with no beginning
and never-ending"

Spiral Dancing is a really heart-opening experience. There were probably somewhere around 180 people all doing this dance, so we were all very close to one another throughout the dance because of the size of the space we were in. Because of the way you face each other at each point in the dance, you are looking directly into the eyes of every single other person in the room as you pass them. After all of the chanting, singing and dancing we had already been doing, along with the primal and spiritual rhythms of the drums, flutes, and bowls....it was really as though all of us breathing, singing, moving, dancing, chanting bodies were all ONE. I am that I AM. We were all just one big smile of love radiating inward and outward in all directions. Flowing, singing, dancing, smiling, loving, breathing, BEING!

Once we had finished this dance and re-situated ourselves back to sitting either in chairs or on meditation cushions, Michael Gott sang and played piano to ease our minds back towards stillness. Then John Sullivan on the Native American Flute and Jodi Roberts on the Tibetan Bowls played for us to deepen the silence as we all went within for a 20 minute group meditation. It was during this sit I had some of the most profound experience of the evening.

In learning to practice EDINA, we learn several meditations and techniques for preparing ourselves and a space for healing. One such tool is the use of the Violet Flame as a containment field for a healing or sacred space. The method is simply to visualize and intend violet flames filling the given space or in a cone shape if outdoors, there are also chants that can be used to invoke the Violet Flame (see link for more info). The purpose is to take any lower-vibration energy in yourself or the space and transmute it into pure Light or pure Spirit energy. It is then returned to the person or space in a beneficial way.

Normally when I visualize this in a space, it happens slowly, in a step-by-step kind of way. First the the floor is covered with flames, then it creeps up higher and higher until it fills the space. Well, not this time. I went to visualize the flames and BOOM the whole space was full with raging, spiraling violet fire. It kept growing in strength and getting bigger and bigger. Suddenly my point of view changed from being inside my body, observing the scene, to floating high above the building, looking down upon and through the building. The Violet Flame just kept growing in size until it had spread out for a mile radius around the building. Once I could clearly see this flame anchored and radiating for a mile around the Center for Spiritual Living, my point of view returned again to my body.

As the violet flames spiraled upward like an inverted tornado, I noticed a vortex of energy forming like a downward-spiraling tornado below, mirroring, the flames. It began along the plane of the earth from which the flames were rising and penetrated down, down, down. But it did not go into the earth as I would have expected it to, instead it was silvery-dark and transparent. Through it I peered down into a starry cosmos. Not only was the floor of the building gone, but so was the Earth! I felt as though I was sitting on the edge of a double whirlpool in space, with violet flames rising and spinning upwards, and anything that did not need to be there flowing down and out into the cosmos through this spiraling vorex. I just sat there and marveled at it for a timeless time.

Slowly, piano, flute and bowls nudged us gently out of our deep state and back into normal consciousness. We then watched and listened as Monica LeCrone spirit-danced to a song played by Michael Gott, and then reveled in the vocal rhythms of spoken word expressed through Veronica Valles' poetry and Spiritual Mind Treatment. Brother ChiSing also read some of his poetry and delivered and impassioned message about conscious creation of a New Earth, right here, right now, and the importance of mindfulness and community, especially over the next few years in our rapidly-changing world. Together we all sang the song "Love, Serve and Remember" and then chanted "Amithabha" which means "Infinite Light" as the Goddesses gathered once again around the table for a candlelit prayer ritual.

Everyone was encouraged to call out the names of people, places, events, situations in their lives or the lives of others for whom they would like to offer blessings, light, and love. As we heard these called out, the Goddesses would light one of the many candles covering the table. Being in the center of concentric circles of such amazing energy was quickly overwhelming for me, and many others there. As the prayers were called out I was filled with a myriad of many emotions, all swirling around inside and my tears just started to flow. I think by the end of it, none of the 8 Goddesses nor Br. ChiSing had a dry eye. It was beautiful and powerful, and I have since heard several stories of spontaneous healings that came out of the prayers sent out that evening.

As the Prayer Ritual came to a close, we gathered again in a circle, only this time we were in several concentric circles as we danced together one of the Dances of Universal Peace. As we sang and did the movements to "The Ocean Refuses No River," drummers were drumming and music was playing and we danced and sang together, in alternating directions, and in rounds, faster and faster and faster until were were all ecstatic with the cumulative power of the evening. When we finally stopped, panting, and glistening with Spirit in Expression, it seemed like no one wanted to leave, to break the magic spell of the evening. We all placed one hand on our hearts and walked around greeting others but touching together the palms of the other hands. Many hands and hugs were shared as people mingled, shared Love and Light, and slowly began to leave and we ended the night.

It was, by far, one of the best nights of my life...and it's just the first of 12 such rituals that Br. ChiSing will lead! I have also heard of several other "events" in the works that might have been possibly inspired by this event. The energy from that group that evening was, and still is, radiating out in all directions infinitely and exponentially affecting and changing the world as it spreads out in waves and ripples of Love and Light around this plants we call home.

And I am filled with gratitude!

Namaste!

Meditation with EDINA

A few weeks ago I went home to visit family. While we were there, my aunt, a BodyTalk practitioner, did sessions on myself and my husband and our kids. We all had really great sessions with allergies being worked on in all of us, but one thing that was interesting was that, on both my husband and myself, the body asked to have our gonads worked on (energetically, lol).

Then, once back home, we went to our meditation group. On Sunday at the Sangha, I connected in to the EDINA energy and myself and began to meditate. Not only did I notice that I was able to slip into a transcendental state much more easily (than times when I have meditated without connecting) and maintain it longer, but I also felt compelled to channel the EDINA energy and place my hands over my lower abdomen, over the area of the uterus, near the Chinese acupuncture point named Dan Tien. Dan Tien translated to English can mean "elixir field" or "energy field." "Dan" is a ball of energy that is believed to have its origin in the Celestial realms. "Tien" means field, or elixir. So, a Dan Tien is loosely translated as field or elixir of energy. According to ancient Chinese philosophy, a person has three Dan Tien, one in the lower abdomen near the 2nd Chakra (lower Dan Tien), one at the level of the heart near the area of the Heart Chakra (middle Dan Tien) and one at the third eye Chakra (upper Dan Tien). Some sources have the middle Dan Tien placed at the lower abdomen and the lower Dan Tien at the perineum, near the 1st Chakra. In qi gong, energy is cultivated at these locations without reference to any of the seven Chakras.

As I focused the energy through my hands over my lower abdomen and got a very strong sense of the "path" the energy was following/flowing in/through my body. I could feel it coming down through my crown Chakra and flowing along the spine, bifurcating around the area of the heart
Chakra and traveling down both arms, through my hands (which were suddenly HOT) and into my uterus. From there, it swirled around, then traveled back up the spine into the pineal gland at the center of my skull. I thought this was especially interesting in light of a lecture called the 2012 Enigma by David Wilcock that I recently watched on YouTube. He talks about the importance of the pineal glad in meditation and how, when activated, it creates a gateway to inner and outer spiritual realms.

At one point in the meditation, I had my eyes open but relaxed and gently focused on a candle flame in front of me and everything and everyone (remember i was in a room full of people in deep meditation) within my vision started to go grey and "melt" away and all I could see was the flame. I closed my eyes and it felt like I was floating in space and my body/mind/spirit was flattening and stretching spreading out and becoming transparent as it expanded. I could see billions upon billions of stars and galaxies and also the blue-white ever-changing energetic gridlines connecting everything in the universe...the fabric of time and space. It looked similar to Alex Gray's painting entitled "Theologue" except I was in space rather than over a mountain range and there were no flames. It was definitely a deep moment of meditation and connection and I am looking forward to connecting to the EDINA energy again in the future during my meditation sessions!

Shortly after that experience, I learned that I could simultaneously connect myself and my husband to the EDINA energy while we were meditating together. At our next Sangha meditation, I connected in for both of us and something very interesting happened. The room was rather cool with the air conditioner on and we both had on meditation shawls. Not too long after I connected, I started to heat up rapidly all throughout my torso. About the same time I heard my husband, who was sitting next to me, toss off his shawl. Later we talked and he said he felt suddenly filled with heat. This was very validating for me as he is not an EDINA initiate.

The Crystal Journey That Set Me On a New Journey

I attended a "crystal journey" group meditation recently where we all intuitively picked from three groups of stones one for each for our heart, throat, and 3rd eye Chakras and then we went into a 40 minute Chakra meditation with music designed to activate each Chakra. The stone I immediately intuitively chose for my 3rd eye happened to be called Shattukite. Once I read about it's properties I immediately thought of the EDINA energy and, of course, connected to the EDINA energy for the journey.

A little about Shattukite:
stimulates and combines the energies of the throat Chakra and the third eye, producing clear concise verbalization of psychic visions and contacts with other worlds.This is a very powerful mineral and its shape both focuses and enhances its power. It is used in the processes of channeling information from the spirit world as well as in communication between this physical world and extra-terrestrial worlds. It does not facilitate contact but rather, allows for precision in communication after established contact. It is used to provide protection against possession during channeling, allowing for the protection of the physical body against invasion. Shattuckite can also be used in re-shaping ones reality, providing for further growth in the direction of ones choice. It can increase ones abilities in automatic writing and sharpens the higher intuitive powers.

As I lay on the floor on my back with the stones over my Chakras and my eyes closed, I let the music wash over me and felt myself slipping into a deep, deep state. At one point, I started seeing many images flick in front of my eyes like I was watching a television screen and someone was changing the channels very quickly. This is something that I have experienced many times before when I started hypnotic regression work. This would frequently happen at the beginning of a session before I dropped down into the state of mind necessary for the work to take place. Before long, I found myself in an inner place that was very familiar to me, though I had not been there in years. It was my "safe place," an inner place I created in my mind probably 8 years ago as a starting point for my regression work.

Everything was exactly as it was years and years ago. I found myself standing near a cliff that dropped off about 50 feet to a sandy beach below. Though I did not go there, I knew that there were vines hanging near the bottom of the cliff and caverns underneath where there is a pod that I have used before to "blast off" into other realms and other dimensions. Up on top of the cliff is a meadow with a river flowing through it to my right (when standing with my back to the cliff), ending in a waterfall going off over the cliff. There is a bridge over the river and a beautiful golden tree on the other side with a golden swing hanging from it. Beyond that are rolling hills into a valley and then back up to mountains in the distance. Ahead of me, beyond the meadow, is a building that is different every time I go there. Sometimes it is a mountain cabin, sometimes a great cathedral....but the adventures that lay beyond the doors within have taken me on many journeys into aspects of myself and helped me to deal with my emotions towards others in a healthy way. Beyond the building is a dense rain forest that I have explored to connect with indigenous ancient wisdom. To my left is another cliff, but it is rising up above me out of the meadow instead of dropping off from it. It runs perpendicular to the cliff that drops off to the beach below, and where the two cliffs meet is a path that appears to go "behind" the cliff. In reality, it is a gateway, and although I didn't go there this time, I knew that once I step through it I am transported to a cold, icy land. I follow a narrow path onto an icy cave with a central, circular cavern lined with icy doors. By "icy" I mean everything is made of solid ice, although after this journey I wonder if it isn't snow-covered crystal. In the center is an icy/crystal throne, and if any of the doors are open, I know it's time to go on an adventure.

But none of these places are where I was to go on this particular journey. Instead, I felt myself drawn to the sky. Traveling in places like this is great because it is all done instantly with intention. Suddenly, I found that it was nighttime out and I was floating in a pool of water that was on/in a cloud, high up in the sky. I know that sounds weird, but I don't know how else to describe it. Remember, this is all inside my mind (which is THE Universal Mind) so it doesn't have to make sense according to the laws of our physical universe. So I'm floating there in the water looking up at all the stars, when suddenly in comes a total blast from my past. It is an old old (young) friend of mine whom I haven't seen in probably as many years as it had been since I visited this place. We hugged for what seemed to me to be an eternity and there was a huge exchange of healing, loving energy between us. It was extremely healing and peaceful. After awhile, it felt "finished" and she left.

The meditation drew to an end and we all slowly came back to semi-normal states of consciousness and shared some of our experiences. I was still pretty far out somewhere, and the room kept turning grey and melting away, all people disappearing, but I felt great. I told the group that I couldn't tell them if we meditated for 20 minutes or 2 hours, all time seemed to disappear.

Upon reflection, I believe that the purpose of everything that happened was for me to see that my inner "safe place" was still a vital part of the Inner Me and that I could go there any time I wanted to, and that I no longer need a guide like I used in the past for my regression/progression/para-gression work (I say it like that because I didn't always go back in time, and sometimes I moved in space but not time to parallel places). I also realized that I needed to get back more deeply involved with crystals as healing and meditation tools. I went home and found my box of altar items and crystals and finally set up my altar and cleared and cleaned all my crystals and set them out on display, which I hadn't done since the move. I even went to a local crystal shop and added some new energy to my collection. I have been carrying several stones and/or with me at all times for different purposes depending on what feels right at the time. I have also been using them in meditation and have been having great results. My husband and I are now planning a day or weekend trip to a nearby crystal mine where we can go dig in the earth and keep whatever treasures we find.

Swan Dance to Open My Heart, All Ways

Two days after getting my new job, I attended an 8-hour retreat led by my new boss. It was research, after all! If I am to promote him I need to experience firsthand what he is all about. I was excited because I had seen advertisements for the retreat and had wanted to do it but it hadn't worked out for me, yet. I showed up bright and early that morning, with an open mind and an eager heart.

For 8 hours we mindfully sat, walked, ate, moved and wrote. None of these tasks were new to me, but it had been a very long time since I had spent that much solid time in meditation. For the first few hours I had "monkey brain" and my thoughts would flit and float here and there, but after awhile I really started reaching some deep states of altered consciousness.

My mantra for the day was:
Inhale: "Yes"
Exhale: "Thank You"

For me, it was based on the idea that when you plant seed of thought and intention into the Law, the Universe always says YES! And if you approach life with gratitude, it brings even more good things into your life. Throughout the day I would vacillate between rote recitation of the mantra, and really meaning it. When I was mindful, present in the here and now, and aware, I could feel the YES! and the Thank You! in my whole body.

After a mindfully-eaten lunch, in which I tasted tastes and felt textures like I had never truly tasted my food before...we mindfully took a walk. As we walked down to the creek and crossed the bridge, a pair of pure white swans came quickly swimming up to our group. One swan (the male?) was "pacing" back and forth in front of our group while the other (the female?) remained more aloof and towards the center of the creek. I was mesmerized, and in that moment, I felt at one with the male swan and his dance. It was as if I had never truly seen a swan in my life before that moment. I marveled at the size and power and of the bird as he paddled powerful legs under the water that propelled him forward in surges that indicated a strength I had never expected from such a graceful creature. His neck was strong and thick, and, as he came right in front of me, not 2 feet away, our eyes locked. I was surprised to see he had deep steely soulful blue eyes. I knew in that moment that he felt the connection as well. He lingered with my gaze for a few moments and then continued his dance. As our group moved across the bridge and along the shore on the other side, our swan friend followed. I split from the group at this point because I could not tear myself away from the majesty of these swans and their dance. As I walked up to the edge of the creek, my friend, my soul brother, came to me and once again danced back and forth in front of me with those soulful eyes. I was overcome with emotion and welled up with tears, our lives were so beautiful, so inextricably connected, in that moment. I could feel the swan and I know he could feel me as well. Some many long moments after, I made my way back across the bridge, my new friend following along, and took one last gaze into those eyes like deep watery pools before making my way back inside with the group.

In our next round of sitting meditation, I felt and sensed something happen in my heart Chakra that I had not felt in a long time. It was as if a million-petaled lotus flower was continually unfolding and blossoming out of my heart. It was made up of beautiful gentle pink energy and radiated out from my heart in an horizontal plane that surrounded the earth, linking up to all the open heart Chakras it intersected on its way. It was very beautiful and loving.

Soon it came time to try our hands at writing meditation. We had five minutes to write a letter to God/The Universe/Spirit, or whatever your idea of the divine is. And then we were to do some automatic writing for 5 minutes in response to our letter.

Here are my letters:

Oh Great Spirit, Mind of this Perfect Universe,

I come into awareness of The Presence in deep Joy, Peace, and Gratitude. Life, lately, has been a great challenge to my Spirit, Soul, Will, and ability to trust and have faith that this Abundant Universe is providing for me and my family in all ways and at all times. I feel as if I am silver being held to the flame for purification, and boy is the fire hot! I feel I have finally reached the point of surrendering to the flow of life rather that continuing to feebly and fiercely cling to the banks of what I know. I ask now for some form of elaboration or indication of the Universe's movements to align into the reality I have been faithfully holding in my mind these past months.

In Love and Peace,
Conscious Evolver

And here is what I got in response:

Dear Conscious Evolver,

What a Joy you are! You have finally stopped rehearsing for life and started actually living it! All of the things you desire and more are already yours, you have but to reach out with your heart and grasp them, claim them as your own. You are always, always ALWAYS cradled in Light, Love, Peace, and Abundance in ALL WAYS.

Always love in ALL WAYS
Always peace in ALL WAYS
Always light in ALL WAYS
Always abundance in ALL WAYS.

Love,
God

So out of this I have found myself a new mantra: "Always in All Ways"

"Namo Buddhaya
Namo Dharmaya
Namo Sanghaya
Namo Nama"

At the retreat, our facilitator told us his "formula" for maintaining and active and successful spiritual practice that will help us all to live more balanced, connected and fulfilling lives and to eventually all become Buddhas, or Awakened Ones:

1. Daily Meditation for 15-20 minutes
2. Weekly Sanghas (group meditation circles)
3. Yearly (or bi-annually, or even quarterly) Retreats, the longer the better.
   

Since that day, I feel as though I am different. Old ways of thinking and of being seem a dim and misty past that I to which I no longer relate. I feel more connected to my husband, my kids, and everyone I meet. I walk outside and feel the trees, listen to the wind, savor the air. I take off my shoes and walk on the Earth, giving and receiving love and energy with my mother. Where before I would feel judgment, I feel compassion, where before I might feel anger, I can smile and laugh it off.

I am not saying it is like this all the time, I am still integrating all of these experiences and sometimes the stresses of daily life pull me out of this mindset and I react rather than respond mindfully. But it seems to be easier to breathe, come back to center, and let things go. Every day, I am able to make little changes in the moment that make a big difference in my mindset and outlook. I always knew, intellectually, the importance of breath, but now I know it and am really starting to embody these principles that I have long thought were really nice ideas.

And I am filled with gratitude!

Living in Answered Prayer in a Limitless Universe

In December 2007, I moved my family, including 2 young children, 6 hours away from everything that was home to us.....for a job I no longer have.

And I couldn't be happier.

Sounds crazy, eh?

I have no desire to relive, or perpetuate by sharing, the drama that led me to be in the position of being without the job for which I moved my family halfway across this state. It really isn't important, other than for me to send gratitude to the person who convinced me to move here, even if the reasons were mostly smoke and mirrors. Or maybe, as more than one person has suggested, the Universe/Spirit conspired to get me where I am, and that person was simply the catalyst. The more events unfold, the more I believe the rapid changes in my life these past months have something to do with my EDINA initiation in the Fall of 2007 (but that is a topic for another post that will be coming in the future).

Hey, whatever it was, it got me here. Here, where I begin the rest of my life.

Here, where I have learned how to truly live.

And I am filled with gratitude.

So. I spent 5+ years on a Master's in Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine. I took my board exams, filled out the appropriate paperwork, and payed the required fees to the state to get a license to practice. Now what? I watched The Secret awhile back, and have been familiar with the concepts within for many years. Up until this point, they had all been "nice ideas" to intellectualize about. I decided NOW was as good a time as any to really commit myself to this stuff and start moving things forward in my life the way I want them. So now what do I do spiritually to move things along? At first it was all about visualizing myself in a fabulous office space (location, location, location), with a booming practice, many satisfied patients, and money to do all the things I wanted. I focused on this for a long time and opportunities came......and went, here and there.

Inside I was struggling.

Something about fitting into the mold of CAM (Complimentary and Alternative Medicine) was not working for me. My school was very interested in furthering the field of Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine and strongly urged us to seek to integrate ourselves in with Western Allopathic Doctors. Many of my classmates sought to prove themselves as Primary Caregivers in very westernized clinical settings. I was told, after attending a BodyTalk seminar (that I was very excited about), that I should be wary of "diluting" myself with too many "out there" modalities, that it lessened my credibility, and that of the field as a whole.

So I bought into it.

For years, I focused on my studies (and margaritas, lol) and pushed my interest in energetic healing methods to the back burner. There it simmered, waiting until it was cooked to perfection. I continued my spiritual practice of visualizing myself really enjoying being the head of a booming successful acupuncture practice.

But inside I still struggled.

Something about the vision wasn't working for me. Little tickles in the back of my mind kept leading me to read, seek, and learn. My spirit felt tugged in a different direction. But I wasn't willing to see the part of me that was there, all along, pulling the strings.

Meanwhile, I found a spiritual community of like-minded individuals and literally felt like I had found home. Myself and my family were welcomed with open arms and we began to get involved and connected with this amazing group of souls. I learned many tools that helped to tweak, fine-tune, and discipline my spiritual practice. It was Extreme Makeover: Spirit Edition, and I was ripe for it!

I learned a few very important things:

• That I am a "CO-creator." I'm not doing this alone. I do my part by planting seeds of intentional thought, and the Law/Universe does the work actually growing the plants. "I" am not manifesting anything alone.
• That I need to focus on the "What" not the "How." How could I, in my limited perceptions of the entirety of what there is to know in the universe, even begin to declare what is possible and what is not? It's my job to focus on what outcome I want, and how I want to feel. It's the Law's job to figure out how to rearrange the universe so it manifests to fit the vision I have faithfully held.
• Talk is cheap. The difference between discussion of a lot of nice Spiritual ideas and actual changes appearing in your life is directly mirrored by your level of commitment to, and depth of, your spiritual practice. By spiritual practice, I mean time spent every day in meditation, visualization, and affirmative prayer, and living from a point of gratitude in your life.
  

The more I began to become quiet, the more I started to really listen to that little voice inside my head that was pulling me towards a new path. I decided to "chunk up" a level (or three) with my visualization. Instead of getting so specific about how my space would look, how I'd be making money and being challenged, etc., etc., I simplified my visualization. I focused on being truly happy, challenged, and fulfilled doing something that I enjoyed and that provided for my family. I visualized it being something in the healing and/or spiritual realms that contributed towards raising the consciousness of the planet. That's it. And I focused on how that would feel.

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” - Joseph Campbell

Once I stopped putting limits on how the universe delivered my happiness and abundance, doors began opening for me. The first was a part-time position through my New Thought Church (specifically Science of Mind) as a youth leader. I applied and didn't get the position, but the process helped me in several ways:

• It helped me to break out of my "box" of how it was possible for me to make my living.
  
• It helped me to realize I was feeling very drawn to taking my healing practice in a totally different direction.
  
• I realized I cannot feel peaceful inside without pursuing what, in my mind, are the highest possible avenues of healing and conscious personal spiritual growth and evolution.
  
• I put myself "out there" and it was a great networking move.
• I learned that I could keep positive in the face of a setback, and hold fast to my vision.
  

And my vision of what I wanted for myself down the line was becoming clearer and clearer all the time. I realized that I want to teach, educate, lead, discuss, enlighten, delve, grow, evolve....... and help others do the same. I want to combine my knowledge and talents in Chinese Medicine, Nutrition, Energy Work, BodyTalk, Yoga, Tai Chi Qi Gong, Meditation, etc. and use it to help raise the consciousness of the planet by helping people to learn to raise their own personal vibrations and anchor deeply in their own Light.

I continued my visualizations with new details coalescing around them as my vision became clearer and clearer for my direction. Something big was coming, I could feel it. The Universe was continually rearranging itself in alignment with the intention I was putting forth. I truly began to understand what it means to live in answered prayer. Regardless of what I was currently seeing out in the world with my eyes, I held to my vision, and the feelings it created for me.

When feelings of anxiety, depression, or worry arose, I would breathe them away.

In, and out.

In, and out.

One afternoon in late March 2008 I was doing some volunteer hours at my Church in the office and something miraculous happened. In walked an ordained disciple of the Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh, a member of my church whom I had seen speak and perform before, and had always felt very drawn to. He happened by and stopped in to see if the Senior Minister was in and available for a Spiritual Mind Treatment (aka Affirmative Prayer). Unbeknownst to me, he and the Minister were in the other room praying for, and visualizing the perfect Ministry Assistant to come into his life to help take his ministry to the next level. A few minutes later, he walked back into the office where I was, and told the woman I was with to keep and eye out for anyone who might fit the bill for the position. As he spoke to her about it I listened and started feeling inexplicably drawn to the whole idea. After a bit, I spoke up and he and I started talking. Within 15 minutes he was hugging me and saying "My spiritual sister, I am so glad I have found you!" Not only did he want me for the position, but he saw me as someone to help facilitate portions of his retreats and workshops and work alongside him as well!

Not only was I everything he was looking for, he was so far beyond anything I could have imagined as far someone to help move my life to the next level. Not only had I found a boss, I had found a teacher, a partner, a brother, and a friend. I didn't limit the Universe, and I received a demonstration beyond what I ever could have conceived of myself.

And I am filled with gratitude!

My Top Five, er, SIX Passions!

On March 9th, 2008, I attended at workshop entitled Revealing Your Passion, during which myself and my classmates went through a series of exercises that culminated in us narrowing down, and priority-ranking, our top 5 passions in life. I narrowed mine down to six, and that's good enough for me. :)

Each of these should be preceded by:

"When my life is ideal, I am..."

1. Enjoying an extraordinarily fluid relationship with my husband and children in all aspects of our lives.
2. Joyously writing, singing, speaking, and embodying divinely guided words that inspire and uplift others, especially children, into a greater sense of spiritual awareness and connection.
3. Attracting to myself a close-knit, spiritual community of like-minded, heart-centered kindred spirits for dialogue, conscious evolution & playful celebration.
4. Living, working and playing in luxury with the knowledge that all resources are abundantly provided.
5. Celebrating Perfect Health in a Vital, Energetic and Fit body that is continuously self-Healing in every moment.
6. Expressing my divinity through the creation, performance and enjoyment of celebrated spiritual music, dancing and art.

This or Something Better.

The last part was on the worksheet we were given, and I like it. Why limit yourself to only what you can imagine? The whole of the universe stands before us, waiting for us to reach out and make a choice.

“Take the first step in faith you don’t have to see the whole staircase just take the first step” - Martin Luther King Jr.

The idea is to print these out and have them everywhere....in your wallet, your planner, as bookmarks, on the bathroom mirror, by the computer monitor, in the car (though I do not recommend reading them while driving), etc., etc., etc. This way you can read them over and over and internalize them. With them on the forefront of your mind, you are more likely to make choices and act in alignment with these passions that will move you towards manifesting your dreams.

I can tell you that I have seen amazing differences in each of the areas that my top 6 passions cover. I am looking forward to seeing what comes next!